Rebelling against rules and routines is part of children’s development. But if they don’t learn to accept limitations at all, it can lead to problems. However, this process is more complex than it sounds, suggests a longitudinal study for which parents of three- and five-year-old children provided information.
It turned out that if the parents were under stress during their offspring’s early childhood or if they raised the children very strictly, sons and daughters at the age of five had problems adhering to rules and routines. On the other hand, rules and routines that are accepted seem to protect against such difficulties to a certain extent. If the children did not follow the rules right from the start, this increased the stress on the parents.
The data comes from the Future of Families and Child Wellbeing Study and are based on a survey of around 2,500 mothers with children. Overall, there seems to be a reciprocal connection between children’s compliance and parents’ behavior.
source
Selman, SB, & Dilworth-Bart, JE (2025): Reciprocal longitudinal relationships between child routines and parenting. Family relations. DOI: 10.1111/fare.70021
Your feedback on this article to the editors
Article on the topic
At times, small children are very focused on mom or dad – and in extreme cases, completely reject the other person. What are the causes and what can help?
Smartphones in children’s hands: This is what parents should know
“Put the phone away now!” Children’s smartphone use is a major contentious issue in many families. Here are the most important facts:
High demands, massive stress and no time to listen to the body’s alarm signals. How to free yourself from systems that cause illness at work
