How to focus better

not in another world. I too have to deal with floods of information. There is also a lot of “traffic” in my life. But I don’t see it as a burden. I have decided that it is part of my life, and so it is easier for me to sort: now/later, important/unimportant, based on what is important to me personally and professionally. I can communicate, divided into manageable portions, when I need a break from concentrated work. It is advantageous to be a little older and to have seen and experienced a lot. Not everything is worth fussing about. Not everything needs full attention.

A flair helps me sort and organize. It didn’t fall from heaven and it’s not my specialty; All people have the ability to do this by nature. It is hidden behind the middle of the forehead and is the size of a two-euro coin: the prefrontal cortex. Its training comes through experiences, good and bad. They arise on their own, but the important thing is to draw conclusions from them. I take time for this, in the evening before I fall asleep and in the morning after I wake up. It goes through my head: What did I do right and what did I do wrong, for example in communicating with a friend? What did I miss, what was worded incorrectly, what can I do better? Yes, it may be that the thoughts don’t stop circling. Then I pick up another book and read a bit. Soon there will be peace in your head.

The joy of missing out

Many today suffer from FOMO, fear of missing out. You can’t miss anything. You put yourself under pressure to absolutely have to experience something. You need to “enjoy life.” And so they hop from event to event and immediately leave if it isn’t “totally exciting” – the music is playing somewhere else, always somewhere else. I don’t do that to myself. I think a lot of JOMO, joy of missing out. I enjoy missing out without any regrets. The better I can stick to one thing that I decide to do, perhaps arbitrarily. And if it’s not exciting? Then that’s it. Another try tomorrow.

What helps me a lot is the paper. Yes, it depends on the paper. I didn’t realize this for a long time, I just loved reading and writing, on paper. Until neurobiology discovered that paper is good for attention. Electrical activity in the brain shows alpha and theta waves when reading on a screen, typical of short-term attention, while reading on paper shows beta and gamma waves, an indication of sustained concentration. When writing on paper, the pen is delicately guided by the hand, a much more complicated movement than typing on a cold surface. Many more neurons and synapses are active, which prevents dementia.

Hybrid lifestyle

This does not mean that only the analogue counts. By no means do I stay away from social media and digital technology, on the contrary, I use them wherever they are useful. The questions I use as a benchmark are: What is helpful, what paralyzes me? What makes me smarter, what makes me stupider? I have never stopped appreciating analog media (books and newspapers on paper) and sensuality (seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting, touching). Through trial and error, I found the mix that best suits both sides, I call it a hybrid lifestyle.

And it makes sense to me to have real conversations, face to faceto lead with others in order to find connections through exchange with each other that go beyond what I see myself. The connections create meaning, and first and foremost it is the connection that is founded on the real being together itself. A single conversation can be so fulfilling that your whole life seems meaningful again, and it doesn’t have to be a particularly deep conversation; just being interested in each other is enough.

Fixed rituals, fewer decisions

Many people feel lost in modern times. One reason for this is the emptying of life of everything that could once provide a solid framework. There were good reasons for freedom from this, but now it is important to give freedom forms so that it does not remain empty. Habits and rituals help to structure the day, the week and the whole of life, including living together, as banally as possible. This has the advantage of not having to constantly think about what to do now. Some things just happen automatically. And if it turns out to be disruptive? Then it can be changed, even if it takes some effort to get used to it at first.

But what stands in people’s way in modern times when it comes to being able to live is something else. A big problem is the maximum expectations of life that many people have. It’s a bit like a pole vaulter who, in pursuit of the world record, raises the bar higher and higher until he can’t clear it anymore. I set the bar so low that even without a bar I only have to take one step to be able to celebrate my first success every new day. I only have this one important thing to do, just this one page to write, it doesn’t have to be anything more.

Constant focus on happiness leaves you breathless

I certainly don’t succumb to “instantism,” as it has been aptly called. I don’t have to have everything that comes to mind right away. Many people have let Amazon spoil them by ensuring that everything is always delivered immediately. Although the railways in Germany are making sustained efforts to get people used to waiting, they are not getting anywhere. Modern culture is stronger. It is characterized by the inability to see beyond the moment. Everyone always wants to be in the “here and now”, but a large part of life is not in the here and now, but in yesterday and tomorrow, so it becomes more expansive.

And it is the constant focus on happiness that leaves many breathless. I would like to say to my fellow human beings: Stop trying to be happy all the time! Life is not about happiness. Life is about living, and sometimes it turns out to be happy and sometimes unhappy. Some of it is to be enjoyed, but some of it is inedible, and then what? The inedible sides are more manageable if they are accepted. Instead of wasting all your strength fighting against it in vain, it is better to use it to cope well with the bad.